How many times over the years have you sat down and scribbled a few new year’s resolutions or goals with every intent of making that THE YEAR? You picked a word for the year, made a list of goals for your career, health, relationships, leisure, and even your spiritual well-being, only to look back with disappointment and say “Maybe next year.”
Well, cheer up. You are not alone. If fact, from what I have read, you are actually in the majority. I have read that up to 90% of people who make New Years resolutions and goals give up on them before the snow thaws and turns to Spring. That’s not very encouraging is it? That almost makes you want to give up on goal setting all together. So let me ask you then, would you like to change your outcome this year? If so, then stop reading for a minute and go get a pad and pen (or digital) so you can write some things down.
I believe that before you even sit down and create your goals for 2020 (or any year), that you MUST first understand your purpose. If your goals do not align with your purpose then you’re just waisting your time checking off boxes that will never bring fulfillment. To know your true purpose though, you need to identify your values, gifts, and experiences. Then at the center of those three overlapping circles you will discover your purpose.
There are a ton of great resources available to help you with these areas, but let me give a crash course and then you can spend some time researching to put some meat on these bones.
Life Coach Tim Brownson tells us, “Without fully understanding your values and aligning with them, you’re not only exponentially less likely to hit them (goals), but much more importantly, you are less likely to enjoy the process, and that is the real waste.”
Values are what you hold near and dear to our heart. They are the backdrop of every decision you make. Understanding our values will help us to understand why we act and react the way we do to the situations and circumstances in our lives.
“Values are foundational beliefs that anchor our lives. The things that matter to us the most, the nonnegotiable characteristics that best describe who we are.” Gary Collins
Below is a list of values. Take about ten minutes and read over them and define them in your mind. Once you have done that, read over them again with the intent of determining which values best define who you are. If there are some values that you see missing, add them to the list.
Abundance Accountability Achievement Advancement Adventure
Ambition Arts Authority Balance Commitment
Community Compassion Competence Competition Creativity
Democracy Development Discipline Discipleship Empathy
Empowerment Excellence Excitement Fairness Fame
Flexibility Freedom Friendship Fun Family
Growth Health Helping Others Honesty Humor
Independence Influence Integrity Intellect Intimacy
Intuition Job Security Joy Kindness Leadership
Love Manliness Money Nature Order
Organization Power Privacy Quality Recognition
Relationship Responsibility Security Self-Respect Serenity
Spirituality Status Time Truth Variety
Wisdom Womanhood __________ __________ __________
Life Coach, Nancy Paul, informs us that when we are in touch with our values it becomes easier to make choices and decisions. Here is a quick assessment to help you determine what values are most important to you at this time.
- Circle the top 25 that you feel resonate with who you are, not the ones you want or others want in you.
- Next, use a highlighter to color over about half of them to reduce your list to twelve.
- Now, narrow your list even further by using a different colored pen to star your top five.
The top five that you left with will more that likely be the values that truly motivate your reactions, decisions, and choices that you make throughout your day. Are those top five what you thought they would be? Do you see how the correlate to the way you live your life?
For some of you that may been a lot to process, for other’s, it was a piece of cake. If you are interested in walking through the next two exercises of Experiences and Gifts so that you can create and achieve your goals for 2020, please call or email me so that we can set up an appointment over coffee. At CIT, we know that teamwork makes the dream work, and this is one of the ways that we want help you succeed. Call Roger Nelmes on his cell phone, 832-416-2394, or email him, firstname.lastname@example.org. We are looking forward to seeing you find fulfillment in 2020!